Today, I’m excited to host a guest blog on my blog by my pal, screenwriter and author Max Adams. I had the pleasure of getting to know Max a few years ago at the San Antonio Film Festival, when we were on several lively panels together. She has written numerous Hollywood studio films, including EXCESS BAGGAGE and ONE FOR THE MONEY. Max founded the Austin, Texas based Academy of Film Writing, a school for screenwriters, and teaches several online classes. She has also written a best-selling book on the subject, THE NEW SCREENWRITER’S SURVIVAL GUIDE.  Sharp, savvy, funny, and beautiful, Max knows her stuff about the craft and business of screenwriting. On her guest blog below, she shares a few tips on script technique…

Five Instant Script Fixes

THE BAD NEWS: If you’re making these 5 mistakes, you’re not ready for prime time.

THE GOOD NEWS: Correcting these 5 mistakes will rocket your script quality up so fast NASA will dial you for launch tips.

1:  NAKED SCENE HEADERS: Naked scene headers are headers floating on the page with no scene description:

……….INT. KITCHEN – DAY

………………………………………BOB
…………………………Who won the game?

No scene header should float alone on the page. At the very least — and I do mean very least — a reader must know WHO is in the scene:

……….INT. KITCHEN – DAY

……….Bob looks up at Dan.

………………………………………BOB

…………………………Who won the game?

2:  FORMS OF BEING: “Is” is not your friend. Bob is lounging. Bob is eating. Bob is talking. Action is only immediate if verbs are immediate:

Bob lounges, Bob eats, Bob talks.

3:  TONTO SPEAK: Tonto Speak is scene description with all the articles (the, a, an) chopped out of sentences:

Bob opens door.  Bob drives car.  Bob kicks soccer ball.

There is no universe in which reading 100 pages of Tonto Speak will not be painful and also justification to douse a script with lighter fluid and watch it burn.

Bob opens THE door, Bob drives THE car, Bob kicks THE soccer ball.

4:  NUMERIC DIALOGUE: Dialogue is not a text message or a math equation. Dialogue is the spoken word. Which can you pronounce, reading it out as dialogue?

15?

Fifteen? [Hint, "fifteen." That is dialogue.]

5:  BAD PARENTHETICALS: Parentheticals are about defining inflection and attitude in dialogue when they aren’t clear in context and wording alone.

Here’s dialogue that is clear without a parenthetical:

………………………………………BOB
…………………………That’s great!

Here’s dialogue that is not clear without a parenthetical:

………………………………………BOB
……………………………..(dripping sarcasm)
…………………………That’s great.

Parentheticals are also not about physical action. Here’s a parenthetical carrying action it shouldn’t be carrying:
………………………………………BOB
……………………………..(striding across the room and bear hugging Dan)
…………………………That’s great!

Here’s what that should actually look like on the page:

……….INT. KITCHEN – DAY

……….Bob strides across the room and bear hugs Dan.

………………………………………BOB
…………………………That’s great!

The link for the book site is at http://screenwriterssurvivalguide.com

MAX ADAMS is an author and screenwriter. Winner of a Nicholl Fellowship in Screenwriting and an Austin Film Festival screenwriting award early in her career, Max went on to be dubbed “Red Hot Adams” by Daily Variety and has worked with Columbia Pictures, Hollywood Pictures, Touchstone Pictures, Universal Pictures, Walt Disney Studios, and Tri-Star Pictures — among others. Max is the founder of two international online screenwriting workshops, The Left Door and 5150, is the author of The New Screenwriter’s Survival Guide, is a University of Utah adjunct professor, is a former WGA online mentor, and is the founder and mover and shaker behind The Academy of Film Writing. Her produced feature films include Excess Baggage, The Ladykillers, One For the Money and she most recently appeared in Tony Tarantino’s Underbelly Blues.